Monday, October 26, 2015

My Eulogy: Rest Now Grandma

If you'll allow me, I'd like to add a little levity today...

Her touch was as soft as the biscuits that she baked,
Her laugh as sweet as the tea that she brewed and
Her wit was as quick as a slap on the knee (or arm, or shoulder, or any appendage available to her).

Aunt Kristie if you were sitting a little closer I'd slap you on the knee right now.

All of us knew Grandma at different periods in her life, obviously I met her at a latter station. As I have reminisced about our time together over the last few days I couldn't help but to think about the summers spent while visiting from California. 

The days always had the same basic script. Patrick and I would get up with grandpa at 5am, I'm not sure we knew what 5am was before we met Grandpa. He'd take us in to town to Bill's Texaco station and buy us a Yoo Hoo and a treat while he drank coffee and visited with his friends. Patrick and I would fight over who got to sit on the only thing that could be used as a seat. It could be best described as a cinder block window ledge but at 5:30 am it was relief. We stopped by the post office on the way home. Grandma was usually up by then and the four of us would start to make breakfast while everyone else was still asleep. 

Patrick would go with Grandpa and they would make gravy while Grandma and I would bake the biscuits. The rest of the house would wake up except for Uncle Mike and Aunt Kristie, they always woke up an hour later than everyone else.

The rest of the day went something like this: we'd all pile into a caravan of vehicles and drive minimum one hour to somewhere fun, day trips to Grandfather Mountain, or to my favorite a picnic on Roan Mountain and at the same time we'd plan the next meal.

Six years ago after one of those trips to the Roan, with Ashleigh and I, Grandma asked me if I would speak today. I'm glad that I can honor her request. It's a difficult task to manage, speaking about someone you love and honoring their character. I was never nervous about it. I figured God would help me put the right arrangement of words together. It's amazing to me how he delivers his message. 

The story that I want to tell you today might be considered controversial, it wasn't to Grandma and so I think that it shouldn't be for you because, well, it's her day. So, I'd appreciate a little latitude. 

I'll never forget the circumstances surrounding our conversation. Grandpa, Grandma and I drove back from Aunt Patti's after eating dinner. My stomach was upset because Grandma convinced me that I really needed to have that third plate of BBQ, (she was good at that), third plates are never a good idea. 

Grandpa went to bed while Grandma and I stayed up to play Rummy. We were sitting at the nook in the kitchen. Grandma and I talked about more than baking biscuits. We were close. I was in High School and my curiosity in scripture had reached a peak. I don't remember the current event at the time that prompted my question: 

"Grandma, how do you feel about homosexuality"?

Her response was epic: "Honey, I love Elton John". "Rummy"!

We laughed and continued our conversation. This isn't a direct quote, I can't remember what her exact words were but the general gist was "if we all spent more time trying to solve the problems in the mirror instead of pointing fingers at others, we'd all be a lot better off. 

I don't quote scripture often but she helped weave the fabric of my character that day. Matthew 7:1 Judge Not. It's not like I went around judging everyone prior to that but like I said before, God delivers his message in amazing ways when we are ready to receive them.

A friend of mine told me that if we look at our life like a vessel sailing over still water, we'd want to make sure that our wake doesn't negatively impact anyone else. I feel like that embodies Grandma, her wake gently touched you in positive ways.

I know I'll make biscuits with her again one day...
because...
I just can't imagine Heaven without Biscuits and Gravy. 


My experiences are new to me. They're probably not new to you. Most of the time, I'm just working out in my head what the Silver and Black Lining is.