Charcoal vs Propane

Depending on which website you visit, the Earth cruises along at about 1000 mph. We hear and use many expressions about time; "time flies when you are having fun", "this year is flying by"," "where has this month gone"?

I sometimes wonder if time "flew" at the beginning of time? Did Caveman sit around the proverbial fire and grunt to themselves about how "the year had just got away from them"? Did time fly when they were foraging for nuts and shelter or killing saber tooth tigers with sticks. Did Romans feel like life was zipping along after exiting the Colosseo? I can't imagine anyone thinking to themselves during the Dust Bowl or the 1930s in general that life was a breeze?

The distractions in today's 4G world make it difficult to stop and smell the roses sometimes. How can we get information faster. We faxed, emailed, now we text. We download any information that we want in less than 10 seconds. With everyone trying to figure out how to speed things up, lost is the practice of appreciating the small things.

Most will agree that the taste of food grilled using charcoal is superior to that prepared over propane. Why then would we use propane? The answer is simply that it's faster and more convenient. The quality sacrificed is probably minimal but it speaks to my larger point. Besides the food being amazing, as a child, I loved when we grilled because I got to spend time with my Dad. While the coals were burning, we played. We threw the football or the baseball or my parents just watched us ride our bikes and play.

It is probably natural to come to the realization at one point in your life that time is precious. I am sure that realization correlates with prioritizing your life. When one arrives at the precipice, deciding on who and what is most important in their life, that is when time will cease to matter in the figurative sense. As long as you figure out those variables, you'll be able to live in the moment and focus your energy on the important things.

Figuring "it" out will probably not keep us from one day starting a sentence with "it seems like only yesterday.....", hopefully though, when your last breath is exiting your body, you'll exhale knowing that you didn't sacrifice too many of the important moments.

Home and Garden

As we travel down the road of our lives we pass certain mile markers. Some of these markers, we are very proud of: graduating from high school/college, marriage, buying a house, all come to mind. I recently experienced a new level of grownup-ness that left me in a cloud of confusion that I am still trying to sort through.

I've had conversations before about "adult" moments. Adult moments occur when you are transitioning from young adulthood to a fully independent adult. Often times you have this realization that you are not a kid anymore because you have to sacrifice a recreational act for a more responsible one.

One of my most memorable adult moments came when I was paying bills and watching a favorite childhood movie. I don't remember what was going through my mind when I watched the movie BIG for the first time, (I was ten years old) I can tell you with 100% certainty that I was not thinking the next time I watched this movie I would be writing a check to the water company 12 years later. That was an "adult" moment!

There have been countless more since then. The first time you go to bed at 9:30 is always a tough pill to swallow. Aches and pains after physical activity are depressing. Shopping for health insurance and for some reason buying mulch or fertilizer is always a sobering experience.

This current event/ experience was an adult moment to the 3rd power. It took place April 11 at Heritage Hall inside the famed Rupp Arena. The event: The 35th annual Home and Garden Show. My better half and I have committed to a more spontaneous, more outgoing schedule this spring/summer (while we have the opportunity). Our attendance WAS a spontaneous act, discussed and decided, while reading the Sunday paper (adult moment), that morning on the patio of our new favorite brunch spot "Doodles". It is an important detail to note because we did not anticipate attending this event, this was not a "Dave Matthews Concert" that was circled on the calender months in advance.

First of all, I expected a lot more garden and a lot less booths involving the latest and greatest fruit cutting technology. As soon as we walked in to Heritage Hall, I realized that our sanity for the remainder of the day was going to depend on navigating through the crowd and vendors in the least amount of time while spending least amount of money.

As I stood watching the presentation of the all new versa grater, (which grates countless different cheeses and peppers) it hit me, "I just passed a new mile marker". I am not ashamed of seeing the appeal in the latest foam insulation technology, or wanting a Pergola and new Patio area. I don't want a hundred different garden flags but trellises are cool.

At the end of the day, I was 24 hours older but felt like I aged ten years and I am comfortable with that. I came to the realization that I acted ten years older than I am around age 11, when I bought a short sleeved button down shirt with my OWN money (don't worry Linda, it was on sale). The Home and Garden Show was just another button down shirt....

Good, Better, Best

The circumstances under which one discovers they are going to be a parent vary. From surprise to mild planning to obsessive charts and graphs, the possibilities stretch to the moon and back and probably back again.

I can't speak for everyone, sometimes I am guilty of over thinking the room, (buying a lawnmower comes to mind as an example). When I found out that I was going to hold the most important title a man can ever have, my heart and my brain went to a level of elation and concern that I have never experienced before. I mentioned on a few occasions that I didn't exactly know which adjective to describe how I felt because my emotions ran the gamut.

The news is now eighteen weeks old and I have had an adequate amount of time to wrap my thoughts around our little "sweet potato". While I've had the time to think about the soon to be new Hernandez, I have also taken an equal amount of time to examine myself. I have toiled over how or what I need to do to be everything that my family needs me to be. How can I be BETTER for all of us? I'll spare you the details on how I am planning on adapting. I will say that I can certainly do a better job of not feeling like I have to be in control of everything.

I've envisioned his/her birth, birthdays, bike rides, tee ball, bedtime stories heck I've already seen the kid graduate a couple of times! While I know that all of those things will come faster than I would like, as long as our family navigates this world and this life in an orb of love and communication than we'll come out on top more than we are at the bottom. I am going to my BEST to make sure that we are not at the bottom (literally and figuratively)....

Dreams...

Dreams are like the ocean,
so mysterious and complex.
They can have great effects on you,
they can really vex.

I dream in the day,
I dream in the night.
I dream of the day
when I can hold my little loved one tight.

Dreams are like the ocean
So deep and so pure.
No one can take them away from you,
They are yours for sure.


The above poem was originally written on September 17, 1999. I found it in one of my old journals.

I have been very blessed in my short time on this planet and am very thankful. You are in my dreams little one. Wouldn't it be poetic if I met you on September 17, 2010?

Survey Says???

You are completing your purchase, signing your receipt or collecting change, when you are handed an eighteen inch receipt and it is mentioned to you by the clerk that "if you were to simply visit a website and take a quick survey and give us an excellent or give us the highest score possible than you might win a shopping spree or a year supply of toilet paper or a million dollars.

Today's consumer is more informed than ever before. Business has been reinvented entirely over the last twenty years. Companies are always trying to gain a competitive edge, that part has not changed. Anyone that has worked retail before, knows that it isn't always as simple as right and wrong. You always have consumers with unreasonable expectations. Demanding that they be compensated for any ridiculous inconvenience that they may have suffered. Most people are understanding and if they aren't then some are patient enough to overlook whatever small complaint they have.

How does this all connect? Customers are bit more brave when emailing their complaints. I recently received a complaint on my performance. I know most of your jaws just hit the floor. This customer said I spoke to him in a "cold monotone voice." I wasn't even involved in this customer's transaction, I just happened to pick up the phone when he called to gripe two weeks later. The only thing that I told him that might have been cold was the truth and you all know it wasn't in a "monotone" fashion.

I can't help if a program changes and your deal would have been a bit sweeter if you would have waited two weeks. The deal is done and by the same token if it would have been altered to negatively effect your deal you wouldn't come back to the dealer and say, "I know the rebate went away that I took advantage of two weeks ago so do you want me to give you an additional $500 to make up for it?

When you give someone your word or come to an agreement with a business then you should own up to it. Is it right that the same shirt you bought six weeks ago for $35is now $12, I don't know maybe the question should be "What the hell were you spending $35 on a shirt for?" Maybe your neighbor spent less on his deck than you did with the same company, if you didn't think it was a good deal, then as an adult you HAD the right to NOT take advantage of it. Once you commit, shake hands and write a check it should be end of story. If you want to re-negotiate, then you are at the mercy of whom ever you agreed with and if they don't see things your way, then they are not the bad guys.

Is it worth it to trump up a 90 second phone conversation with an agent of a company as the worst experience of your life so that you can get a couple of free oil changes? How much is your integrity worth?

What Happened to the Troublemaker in Class?

Just going to get right in to it...

Fact: There is no denying that my better half and I have avoided going to the SSO for 2+ years. We have been married for more than 3 years and did not rush out to get her name changed for a couple of different reasons; we were going to be using our passports and didn't want to go through the hassle of getting new ones immediately before our trip (which was scheduled soon after getting married) and we weren't in a rush to have her name officially changed. I didn't care if she changed it or not. I was never insecure about it, it never bothered me!

A culmination of factors finally prompted us to put a proverbial check mark next to the "change last name" item on the to do list.

We pulled in to the parking lot and upon opening the the car door, we were hit with a cloud of what can only be described of as a combination of body odor, ash trays and day old empty beer bottles. I will forever associate that smell with apathy.

The SSO opens at 9am, we entered the building at 9:15. On the back wall there were four windows, three of which were occupied with agents whom were servicing the early risers. The place had been open for 15 minutes and the security guard was already looking at his watch. The atmosphere in the room seemed to suck the energy out of anyone/anything that occupied it longer than 12 seconds. It was teeming with people that already had taken a number, after taking ours we relunctantly sat in the corner.

After 85 seconds, I empathized with the security guard. Three minutes in to the experience, my neighbor realized the guy across from him was an old high school buddy and they proceeded to reminisce, which would have been fine if they were next to each other but they were separated by more than twenty feet. We were all privy to the convo which consisted of comparing parole officers, food stamps and the holy grail "section 8". "I'm trying to get me a piece o dat sektion 8" one said to the other after comparing notes on the two local Hope Centers....

While taking it all in, I was speechless. I couldn't hear myself think. I tried to block it out and converse with my wife but after stuttering uhhs and umms (clearly distracted) I gave up.

I'll tell you what it was like....In grade/middle and high school, everyone had two or three kids in thier class that were different. You could tell they had a rough start to life, their home life wasn't "ideal". They came to school unkempt, they were loud and insolent and distracted. They were the ones that your parents didn't want to be friends with....right??? That Social Security Office was nothing more than a room full of those kids, they were all grown up, same story but different setting.

No doubt, there were people there for legitimate reasons with unfortunate circumstances, I realize that and am not insensitive to that. I am not an elitist, I know that some people cannot help themselves. But the overwhelming majority of people in that office were just trying to get a free ride. They were trying to do just enough to get by.

I can hear my parents now, "don't be lazy, do it right", weather they were talking about doing homework or cutting grass, it was the same philosophy. It takes twice as long when you "half ass it" (dad's words, not mom's) as opposed to doing it right the first time.

occupied

I know it's been a while since my last published post. I feel like I should apologize to all 4 of my faithful blog readers but I won't....

All kidding aside, the last 10 weeks have been extremely exciting for me and I look forward to sharing my thoughts and emotions at the right time.

On a side note, I did import a blog from our 2007 trip to Italy.

more to come....